Tuesday, February 27, 2007

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Check this shit.

My love for 80's/early 90 Mercedes has been completely restored!

P.S.
Your all shit! Not one response to the competition, remember there will be a prize. I'm working on a example for you because you obviously need help.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Competition

I know this is a little premature been as I have about 5 people read my blog (one of them being my Dad), but I am ill and sat at home bored so I have devised a competition, when I say devised I mean stole. This is a complete rip-off of a competition Carrhart held, go to Carhartt Streetwear for a little inspiration.
What I want you do is to customise a paper model of a car.

Step1
Choose which car you would like to customize. I have found some nets of some nice 80's European cars that I think will lend themselves well to being paper models. Here are your options:

Fiat Panda
Citroen BX
Renault 5
Mercedes W123

These images reduce in quality as the list goes on, this is because I had to screen dump some and edit others. I went to great effort to get you these.

Step2
Use all or any of your artistic talents to make your model the most exciting paper car model anyone has ever laid their eyes on. You can edit it on your computer with Photoshop or even Paint! You could also print it out and work on it old school with pens, pencils and paints and stuff! You could edit it in 3D by sticking stuff on or cutting bits away.

Step3
Take a picture, if your car is a bit shit then take a good picture you might be able to redeem it!

Step4
Send your picture to me via email to willbeaumont88@hotmail.com then comment this post (or any other competition related posts I may do in the future) with your picture in, so the whole world can see your paper car.

I am not putting a time limit on this competition purely for the fact that I may not get many people doing it. So I will have to make it last quite a while for me to get enough responses.

I will also be giving a prize to the winner. I will judge the entries myself and I will email the winner back so I can get details to send them a prize! I don’t know what this prize will be yet; I’m going to wait until I pay my speeding fine so I can actually have a budget.

Good luck!

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When I initially took this picture I was convinced it was going to be a -, but I've been thinking... if I (a small, skinny, white, middle-class, British, boy) were to drive this Lexus it would perhaps be the opposite to what people would be expecting so would that would make it cool (in a funny ironic way.) but it would only be cool if I did it or people who had similar attributes to me. So if you do not exude all of those elements you probably wont be able to make it look cool, or at least funny.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

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Small, basic, German car in white and on foreign plates! How could this not be cool!

Monday, February 05, 2007

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Mini drivers who think its cool to park next to other Minis, how sad!

Saturday, February 03, 2007

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I know its out of sequence and I know I shouldn’t really rate my own cars but...

... look at how it shines! I love the winter weather I didn’t even have to chamois it. The leaf on the spare wheel adds a nice touch don’t you think?

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

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Some thing a bit more exotic for you this time! By the way these two cars are only acceptable together, it's a contrast thing you will not look cool in either on their own. Unless you have had the Morris Minor from new (this theory doesn't work with the Porsche, although these are the most acceptable of the new Porsches.)

Sunday, January 28, 2007

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I haven't been out much this weekend so I have decided to look back into some of my unused photos on my computer and pick out a good 'un.

This Daihatsu Charade is made even worse by having the thinnest wheel ever conceived by man attached to it. If I had to drive this vehicle and then more unfortunately got a puncture in it and had only that to put on it to replace it, I think I would have chosen to walk, probably making it to my destination on time but just a little more out of breath. I didn't think anyone's embarrassment level could withstand this but the woman who drives this so called vehicle has a drooped, ginger, afro how attractive!

Saturday, January 27, 2007

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Again the next positve car I have to put up is an 80's monster, a bit more of a classic though!

Thursday, January 25, 2007

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Just remember some one had to go to the effort of getting to a Hyundai dealership after deciding they liked the Santa Fe. Then when choosing what colour wanted they would do the impossible and make the situation even worse by getting that colour.
Sorry that the picture is a little blurred, I think I might have been shaking in pure disgust.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

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Been as my blog is probably the most boring blog on the Internet I am going to try and "spice things up a bit!"
I am going to take a picture of a car everyday that I think is worth my effort to put on here. Some of the cars will be examples of good cars and others won't. It’ll be a bit like vice's "dos and don’ts" but with an automotive twist! Sounds exciting I know.

So to start things off with a bang, I have for you this beaut!



A Rover 216, probably not the most exotic car but still quite rare these days. Would you have one of these or a Montego?

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Mini Adventure/ Long, boring, tedious post.

I know I promised I would blog more and I haven’t. I am though for filing one of the things I said I would do and that is blog the Beaumont household’s new car (the one that replaces the Audi). So do your best to enjoy this.

We had to first of all decide between us what car we would buy, Dad didn’t want anything too small because he thinks there are dangerous, Mum wanted something slow and economical and Jack and I wanted a Mini. So like Mr Redmond told us in graphics: children have the buying power and we opted for a new Mini.
That was just the start really. Now the price we/Dad settled on meant that any of the minis would be possible but with variations in age and mileage. Fortunately there are only four main derivatives of Mini's; The Mini One (looked like the most promising because of insurance), the Mini One Diesel (although its more economical, slow and a lower insurance group we thankfully didn’t even consider it) the Mini Cooper (our second option) and the Mini Cooper S (initially our first choice but no one would insure me unless it was third party only so that was ruled out.) So we wanted Air Con, and it had to be Black, Silver or British Racing Green. We didn’t want the seats with the swirly "aqua" pattern on or them in red! We made the mistake of not having a black or grey interior in the Audi (it was blue!) and we wont be doing that again. We also didn’t want the faux Lamborghini/Alfa wheels made from holes! So after being quite specific about the car we wanted we tried searching for one on the autotrader. We have used the autotrader enough to like it, most of the second hand cars we have bought have been on there and we may have sold one or two on there too (our buying and selling ratios don’t quite match each other we seem to accumulate cars like most people do dust). So the website seemed good because we could be quite specific but still our search turned up over more than 200 cars. So the long and painful task of selecting a car began.

For three weeks we scoured the pages filtering out and cars with dodgy colours, accessories, wheels, interiors or modifications. Every one that looked promising was either sold or the number was wrong.
We eventually found one that was promising and was reasonably close, Stratford upon Avon (an extremely nice market town). So dad and me went to view the car. When we got there the lady who was selling it (who also turned out to be extremely nice) was selling it for her daughter (the producer of Channel 4 shows such as Wife Swap and Its Me or the Dog). She began to try and sell us this vehicle doing the worse attempt I could ever imagine. She told us all bout her life and ended up revealing that she may have had about (according to my estimations) £3million worth of assets. Then she told us how much a dealer had offered her, £1000 less that her asking price (as usual for dealers far too low but people will pay not to have to do the leg work themselves) a bad move for her, us now knowing she will accept pretty much anything above that. We had decided that the car was right for us so we/Dad entered into negotiations. We decided that splitting the difference between her asking price and the dealer’s offer was about right, to which her response was "whatever!" So we thought we ‘d knock off another £100 off for us. So we settled that there and then dad and me popped to the bank and got a bankers draft sorted the insurance and I drove away in it an hour after the deal had been confirmed! What a bonus!

It was not as clean as me and dad would have expected been as someone was trying to sell it so I spent yesterday giving it a Beaumont clean. And while I was at it I gave the Defender a going over (not half a much effort need been as I was the last one to clean it!) And in true blogger styli I took some photos (mine being shite because of my lack of talent and I was using my phone. But I gave it ago; they’re also a little bit clichéd, sozzard.)









Thursday, December 07, 2006

Sorry

I must apologize for my recent lack of "bloggin'" recently. Not that any of you really care and I'm sure only one person will actually read this. What makes this even worse is that there has been a whole load of car action in my life recently. Last month the Audi went (the reason why I cannot divulge on the internet, again I'm sorry) and so mum and I had to share the Land Rover for a bit until the nice people at the insurance company spoke to Enterprise car rental and they lent us a vehicle. They told us that we would be getting a Corsa, I can't say that I was excited about this but it definitely wasn't a problem. When we arrived there wasn't a Corsa to be seen and we later found out we were getting a Micra! Yes a Micra, not a cool Mk1 no they gave us one of those new ones. It was repulsive and most definitely the worse car I had ever driven even though it was described as "a lovely drive" by the enterprise man. And to make matters worse the little raised lights (which are cringe worthy) are visible form the inside so you cant ignore the fact you are in a Micra.



About a week after we picked the Micra up we got a call form Enterprise. They told us that we they were going to replace the Micra for us. Apparently the Micra, being a 1.4, was far too sporty (what!) for an 18 year old to drive and there insurance didn't cover me properly. So they found us a nice Kia Picanto, a 998cc Kia Picanto! They're right about the Micra being sporty, when it's compared to a 998cc Picanto! It was so.... Korean! I have never sat in place and been surrounded by so much grey, cheap plastic. To get the car to move from a slight incline you needed about 4000 revs. Then to keep it moving your foot had to be permanently welded to the floor. When moving if you reached a corner you had to brake (ruining the week of hard work you just did to get it to 45mph) because the wheels were so thin that there was little if no grip. The amount of tyre touching the road from all four wheels is about the size of a postage stamp. This now has to be the worst car a have driven and I don't imagine that it will fall from that position soon, well I at least hope not.



If in the future you want hire car I wouldn't recommend Enterprise. Not only did they let me drive around for a week when I wasn't insured properly and changed a bad car for the worse car, the rear tyres were under inflated on the Micra when we picked it up and they wouldn't/couldn't do anything about it. So they let me drive away (only to Graham Goode's where I had to get some fuel) on the road, risking some points on my license, to go and get some air for the tyres.

I must apologize again, for the lack on 1st hand pictures but I just didn't want to risk my camera breaking with the sight of two of the most repulsive looking vehicles ever conceived by man.

I should hopefully get back into the swing of blogging and you there should be some good posts about what we replace the Audi with and maybe a road test of the new Fiat Panda 100bhp.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Monday October 16th 2006

Today was a pretty full day on the car front, it started with me taking the Land Rover to college which was nice I do like it sooo much more than the Audi. I saw today an Aston Martin V8 vantage on Far Gosford street today in Cov, clearly the owner is mad because no one in there right mind would park an expensive car in Cov let alone on Far Gosford street (another reason why I take the Audi!). The Aston was also parked outside a music shop which I thought was funny because who wants music when you have an Aston Martin?

This though was nothing compared to later events! On the way to my house Luke had a spot of bother and unfortunately wrote of his vehicle. He is excellent despite rolling his car into a hedge, no injuries what so ever. And you'll be surprised to know it wasn't a speed related accident, just an unfortunate instinctive reaction.
These are the results...



These pictures were clearly taken before it exploded into a ball of flames and me and Luke saved the life of an old woman taking her grand children (whose lives we also saved) out for a walk! True storey!
I then engaged the low range on the 'drover and pulled luke's car out it was an awesome recovery my second so far! Dad then drove it back to our house (just round the corner), it was a little bit worse for wear and the max seed was about 25mph.
When Dad turned up to help me do the recovery and with him brought his new purchase, a shagged 1972 Alfa Romeo GT 1600 junior (for parts and panels for the 2.0 GTV). So the Beaumont household managed to acquire 2 unroadworthy cars in one day, bonus!
Unfortunately I missed Fifth Gear all but Tif in the Gallardo, not that fussed really it was probably the only good bit.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Top Gear Withdrawal Symptoms

In the depressing months between the Top Gear series Fifth Gear used to keep me happy enough. Not now though, the new layout in some red-neck, greasy spoon cafe (no that's not mean to be café) doesn't help the program and they have hired a new presenter who is the most pointless man ever. His response to Vicky Butler-Henderson's (who was regaining a bit of dignity after her terriblee Top Gear days, until now) question about whether he thought the new Bentley Azure was too much of a footballers car couldn't have been worse in my mind. He went on about how he loved anything that footballers did/wore/owned, this kind of attitude is what has tipped GQ over the edge (now a shite magazine for people who want people to think they are rich), his freedom of speech rights should be taken away, better still his voice box with a blunt implement. Tif is the only good thing about that program, his escapadess in the Williams Renault Clio and new Clio 197 were fantastically entertaining but this still isn't enough to redeem it. As for the other presenters Tom Ford should stick to writing in Top Gear so we don't have to look at him and I couldn't bear to watch all of it so i don't know if Jason Plato is still on it, I hope not after he was so arrogant in the last series.
So what do you do to satisfy your car viewing needs. Get on youtube! Rarely have I been as excited as I was when I found out there were this many car videos on one website. There are videos for any car you can think, of I even found MGB videos, who would want to film one of them? Its even got Tif in the Clios from Monday night on there, this one is great if you can stand the wanker presenter appearing before and after the main bit. Most of the best bits from Top Gear are on there, all of the challenges and tours, so to get your Hammond fix get on those ones (i know watching a video of him won't make him get better more quickly but it sure does make you feel better.)
So you don't have to go trailing through the whole of you tube I have comprised a top 5 best car videos on youtube(in no real order.)

1.

Part of The Hire series BMW commissioned it has fantastic driving, directing and just enough humour to almost make you like Madonna.

2.

Rene Arnoux and Gilles Villeneuve proving that Formula 1 was never as boring as it is now.

3.

Walter Rohl in an Audi Quattro S1 making toe-heeling and left-foot-braking look unbelievably easy.

4.

There are many more top gear videos so I had to chose one, so one with a Lotus and an Apache seemed to make sense.

5.

The Japanese, you gotta love 'em!

P.S.
Saw this on my day off Mercedes 600 (not quite a Pullman though.)

How much do you want one of them!

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Das Wälzen Darüber

Today was the first day my money scheme has come into action, I drove the Audi to college. I will now be doing this every day for the next 9 months because it does 50mpg (46 when I'm driving) where as the Land Rover does 25mpg (20 when im driving).

I love the chance to drive new and different cars (the reason why I went on those test drives, I will blog the next one for you) and this was no exception. I love the hard and bumpy ride you get in the Defender so a wallowing, rolling ride you imagine would be my worst nightmare, well you'd be right and the Audi did live up to its reputation. It also rattles more than the Land Rover does, which I thought was impossible and the fan on the climate control has broken.
So it made me feel sea sick, it was noisy and bloody hot. Other than that though I quite enjoyed it. It wasn't the hideous interior that matches the Ming blue exterior and it definatly wasn't the complete lack of front end grip (wheel spin in your Audi A4 avant is massively embarrassing) I just don't know what it was but i can't wait to use it everyday. The key was pretty fun!
P.S.
Saw this in Brinklow today, check the tyres!

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Riva Aquarama

Saw this shit when in Falmouth.
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Yes Falmouth not Monaco like where you'd expect to see a Riva Aquarama though I think the weather gives it away a bit.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

New Entry

My new entry is second from the bottom, I wrote it on holiday but was waiting for some pictures so never posted it that's why its down there but now its up.

Saturday, September 09, 2006

INTERSECTION

New Intersection..

...buy it now enrich your life!

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Today was a good day!

On my way back from dropping my little brother at Broughton Astley skate park I was accosted by this.

At first I thought it might be a kit car or something of that kind of breed so ignored it. I then heard the noise it was making. It was loud and rough not in cheap kit car way but in a 60's race car way. This was something good! The drivers had pulled over and where reading a map so I got all excited when I realized there must be a road rally on. Despite my excitement I continued home only to go past a Ferrari Dino and a Porsche 911. I then decided home was no where near as exciting as this and followed where I thought they were coming form only to go past an Alfa Romeo GTA and from the quick glimpse I got a racing Alfa very similar to one I believe I saw at GoodWood. All of these cars were extremely tidy and the rarity of some made me think that this was a pretty high class event (thought it would be in octane but when I got home and checked, nothing!). So I continued passing classic cars every 2 minutes with drivers clad in race wear and co drivers clutching maps it was excellent.


I got a bit bored so I pulled over, turned round and waited for one to come past so that I could follow it. To my luck it was a Aston martin DB5. I pulled out and followed him.


I think he got a bit pissed off with me and tried to loose me but because I new the roads I stuck to him like glue, the land rover was rolling and squealing round every corner to keep up. Unfortunately the Aston took a wrong turn and had to turn around. I couldn't turn round quick enough to find him again.
I enjoyed then driving round the county following other classic cars (lots of early 911's it was good!) and loosing them because of peoples incompetence and not being aggressive enough at junctions. I had to go home because I was running low on diesel(not so economical when trying to keep up with sports cars even ones of the 60's) but still had a thoroughly good time.
If anyone does know what was going on and where they ended up please do tell me.
Email: broccoli_05@hotmail.co.uk